Behind the Iron Mask
by Pinkuro
Summary: Raito isn’t a perfect guy. He studies energized by drugs, he sleeps with pills that make him so numb he needs drugs to get up and be the perfect guy everyone expects. In his free time, he cleanses the world, because perfection is a gift. LxRaito DrugAbuse
1. Broken Perfection

**Pinku's note: **Yey! This is my new fic!! It's totally different from my last death note (english) one! But this fic totally proves I can make any story! XD

I had this idea after seeing a documentary about Carmen Miranda, it was called "Bananas is my Business" is was very nice, sad though. It gives me ideas too the Christiane F.'s book. Poor girls, they give me will to cry…

Anyway, hope you like… This had been finally revised by a beta reader!! (not my author's notes, this is never going to be revised!) xDD

_Disclaimer:_ I don't own Death Note, can't you see what would it would be if it does? And I don't get any sort of money with that… (yeah, still poor T.T)

_Warnings:_ Drug Abuse, yaoi, bad speech, yaoi, bad scenes, etc.

_Sumary:_ Raito isn't the perfect guy everybody thinks he is. With the stress of the day and all, he spends until the early morning studying, but he's so tired from the day he has to take drugs of many types to get energy. So to sleep, he's so high he just can do it with sleeping pills, what makes him numb when he wakes up, so he takes drugs to wake up, and have energy during his long day and be the perfect guy everyone waits him to be. And in his free time he cleans the world, because perfection is a gift.

_Pairing:_ L and Raito, mainly.

Raito isn't a perfect guy. He studies energized by drugs, he sleeps with pills that make him so numb he needs drugs to get up and be the perfect guy everyone expects. In his free time, he cleanses the world, because perfection is a gift. Yaoi LxRaito

You're warned. Now you can read! n.n

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Behind the Iron Mask

_Chapter 1__ Broken P__erfection_

Raito yawned. It was dinner time and he felt tired already. Damn. Time passed so fast.

He wasn't hungry at all, though he hadn't eaten all day.

He ate a little., or at least tried and then he excused himself saying he was done and he had to study.

He steered himself to his room, however before sitting in his chair, he decided to take something. He felt so tired… this day had been horrible for him. He walked to the personal bathroom in his room.

He saw himself in the mirror. God, he looked so tired so-so…. _Weak_... he had dark bags under his eyes; his skin was so pale he could see his bones through it, because he was so thin too. He had to do something about it. _Now._

Everybody expected him to be the perfect being he was. Imagine how everyone would react if they saw _this._ What would they think? If he didn't pass the college exams they would be disappointed. If they got disappointed, they would see his real façade behind all his efforts. They would see that he wasn't perfect. That he was just a weak and ugly stupid bitch, just like everyone else.

He then opened the mirror door and took a small orange bottle from inside. It wasn't the only one there, but he didn't care. Now he wanted that one; the others were for later.

He just opened it, and swallowed five little pills at once, not needing water for it.

He was not like that. He was not weak. Nor ugly. Nor even stupid. He couldn't be, not with everything he could do. He was like a god. Yes… A god. This thought was much more refreshing. He was so good in everything; he was every mother's dream son, every girl's dream husband, a teacher's dream, a father's pride. Girls wanted to be with him, boys wanted to be him. His grades were 100 percent and he was beautiful; he was good in sports and an excellent actor and boyfriend, son, amongst other things, all of which he was good at. He was perfect. And who was the only existing perfect being? God.

Yes. That was it.

He was like a god…

He just had to be sure he continued to be. That he never fell. That nobody saw him without proper preparation. Tired, ugly, _weak_. Weakness is for humans. Perfection is for Gods. And perfection like his was a gift. And he had to be sure it would stay this way.

He just had to be careful to keep anyone from finding out these _means_for his perfection. He had to be sure everyone knew, wanted and especially _got_ what they expected from him.

After a couple of minutes holding his temples with a hand, and with the other in the sink, he opened his eyes again and then closed the little bottle and put it in the little mirrored cabinet again.

He didn't need to worry because no one ever saw this. And besides, he hid it behind a false wall he had made inside the cabinet. Even if someone looked, they wouldn't notice the false wall.

He smiled at his reflection and then walked to his desk. He was ready to study now.

"_And then I use this formula and do the calculation… then done! Easy…"_ he thought about a physics exercise. He stretched his arms and neck a little, so many hours studying was not good for his spine… it hurt like hell too._ "4:41 am already? I have to sleep!"_ he thought looking at his alarm clock. He had spent so many hours studying and was so focused that he didn't see the time going. _"I'm not sleepy at all… oh well... Like this is a real problem…" _

He got up, and after placing his things in their correct places, he changed to his pyjamas and went to the bathroom and brushed his teeth.

Then he opened the secret compartment inside his mirror and took out a certain small bottle, different to the one from before. This one was blue.

"_I cannot go to school looking tired and without sleep. I have to sleep…" _he thought before he swallowed six pills at once. _"I have to…" _

He went to bed. The little pills took effect soon. Little by little it took over him, making him not fall asleep, but black out, fainting like a rock. It was a dreamless sleep and nothing could wake him up that moment.

2 hours and 19 minutes later, at 7 o'clock his alarm was ringing. School was at eight so he had to wake up. "Hmn…Lemme sleep…" he mumbled still half sleep, turning off the alarm.

"Hey, bro! 7 am! You have to wake up or you'll be laaate!!!" His sugar high sister Sayu screamed through his door, slamming it when she closed it.

"Damn it," Raito cursed, sitting on top of his bed, finally waking up.

Ten minutes later, he decided to get out of bed. He headed towards the bathroom, but he was still asleep so he kept bumping into things on his way.

He felt numb. He couldn't open his eyes fully, never both at the same time. His legs screamed at him to sit down. If Raito stopped walking he could just sleep there, on his feet. He really felt like shit.

"_Damn bathroom door!!" _He said hitting his face on the closed square wood that was called bathroom door.

He looked himself at the mirror. His hair was messy, the dark bags under his eyes were bigger than yesterday, his eyes were bloodshot, his pupils were dilated like ones from a junky and his face was so pale and thin he looked like some terminal hospital patient.

He wanted to punch his mirror. God he wanted to. This wasn't him. This wasn't him!! It couldn't be!!

Anger.

Fury.

Disappointment.

Sadness.

Confused feelings overtook him.

But he couldn't let these things control him.

So he opened his secret compartment in the mirror and took out a small red bottle.

He opened it. But there were no pills inside this special blood-like bottle. It was a white powder, like salt, but it wasn't salt. On the bottle it said "C" short for _"Cocaine"._

There was a small straw inside the bottle. It was one he had bought in a supermarket and cut in half for better performance.

He gently placed the crystals on the sink and, with the straw, he snorted it all inside. It wasn't a small portion. It had be the biggest he had ever snorted._ "I have to have energy and disposition to all day… I think this must be enough…" _

He felt invigorated but still was not ready. His face was still ugly and weak. He had to do something about that!

Luckily, everything could be fixed, and he knew exactly what to do with his face.

In a small case inside the mirror, he had a few things to do that. With something that looked like a small sponge and a skin-colored powder. With the small sponge, he took the powder and ran it over his face. Soon his pale face looked tanned and blushed.

"Perfect." He smiled at his reflection. He combed his hair so it shadowed his eyes, that way they wouldn't notice nor pay much attention to them, giving them time to return to normal, white and brown and black and just perfect again.

After changing into his school uniform he looked at himself in his big mirror. "Just perfect." He combed his hair again, making it look not too neat, just the way he liked it.

"Good morning," he said smiling while he walked down the stairs.

"Finally ready!! Bro is like a woman! It took half an hour just to get dressed!!" His sister laughed. Raito laughed with her as he sat at his chair at the table, but his was a fake one.

"Sayu, stop teasing your brother! You know you couldn't get the grade you got in the last math test without him!" their mother said, serving the breakfast and sitting at the table.

"Yeah! You depend on me! If I want I can just stop helping you. I kinda _own_ you!" He smirked victoriously.

"Aaah!! You're soo mean!!! But I know you won't do that! You're too good to do that! You'll help me! Won't ya??"

The breakfast continued, Raito ate like he hadn't eaten in months, actually he had just eaten a full meal two days ago at dinner, but that's ok… He finished his plate and asked for more, and after seconds, he asked for a third. It went like that until he had to go to school. That place was terribly boring. He already knew that stuff, and that made it even more terrible.

When he got to his classroom, there were a few people in it. Like always he arrived really early, and he pretended to study as he rested a little, because, though he slept like a rock, he didn't sleep much and this sleep only let him recover half of his full energy.

"Good morning!" he said to his classmates, smiling, the six teenagers were all together in a couple of tables, probably trying to do the homework.

"Good morning, Raito!! We were waiting for you! Can you help us? This physics homework is so hard!!! I can't be in detention again for not doing homework!!" a girl pleaded.

"Yeah, me too!! My parents are gonna kill me!" a boy asked this time, this one was sat in a chair.

"Can you? Please??" another girl asked with puppy eyes.

Raito could see that he would not rest today, until night probably. He couldn't sleep in class either or he could be sent to detention and risk this going on his permanent file! It would ruin his image! Not just for him, but for his parents, friends, and everyone else… it would be terrible.

He couldn't sniff something in the bathroom either, the school had cameras and he couldn't risk such a serious thing like that.

He couldn't take a pill because everyone knew he didn't have any disease and making up one would ruin his perfect image. He never had been sick before and he wouldn't pretend to be sick. Not now, not ever. It would ruin his God-like image.

"Sure, it would be my pleasure." He smiled his fake perfect-boy smile again.

It would be a long day…

Hours had passed.

What a long day this was…

Raito yawned.

He was bored. No, not just bored, he was sick of this class. Why did he have to listen to someone with an IQ lower than his, talking about something he had read and learned five years ago? He was already tired. God, he was so tired. He slept only two and a half hours all night, because he had to prepare himself to the college exams and those pills didn't do much besides making him pass out. But anyway it was better than nothing…

God! He was tired! He needed to sleep! He yawned again and then closed his eyes for a bit, just to be hit by a chalk. He looked at the teacher. "Hey! Pay attention! This school depends on your grades, Raito!! You're making the ad for this school!" The middle aged man said. Or was he younger? Not that Raito really cared… He was so… he yawned once again…

…The bell rang. Finally saved. He got his things and said his goodbyes to everyone and then he ran outside.

He reached a public restroom that he was sure no one used and had no cameras and got into one of the stalls. He kneeled down, putting his bag on the floor.

He opened his backpack and took out a little package from inside. He opened it. There was white powder inside with a small and cut-in-half straw. He set the package on the closed toilet, separated a piece of the white powder, and took the straw in hands. It was a portion of coke even bigger than the last one. He got close to the toilet and sniffed the portion he had designed.

God, it was so much better now. Hahah.

It was like ten orgasms at once.

Now he was ready to go back home.

He put his things in a hidden place in his backpack and closed it, setting it on his back. He cleaned his nose a bit and then he left.

At the mirror he saw his reflection. He hated it. He hated how it looked. This ugly, weak face… _Damn it._ It wasn't his. It wasn't him!!

He put his bag on the sink and took a small case from it. _"No one should ever see this. Nobody will ever see this... thing…"_There was a disgusted look on his face. God. He hated being so weak. To look so weak. He wasn't weak. He wasn't. He opened it and started to make his face up with the maquillage. He wasn't weak, he knew that, and everybody who looked at him who would see that. Perfection. It was all that mattered.

He walked home. It was already night so was pretty dark, but that didn't matter to him. As he walked, the effects of the cocaine started to take over him. God, he loved that! It was so much better than that tired weak boy he was…

As he walked he started to feel a bit dizzy so he walked supporting himself on walls for a while. _"I think I took too much this time…" _he said stopping for a bit. Laughing._ "I'm so high…" _he suddenly stopped laughing.

What was that?

He swore he saw something like notebook falling from the sky, right in front of him!!

"_That's odd…I'm not having hallucinations… or am I?" _He looked suspiciously at the ground where he thought he'd seen the notebook falling. It was really there. _"Good. It wasn't a hallucination…" _Raito smiled happily at this thought. Cocaine could really put someone in a good mood, for a while at least…

He took the note at hands. "Desu Noto" He read the Roman letters forming two English words in his Japanese speech._ "Weird… Hmn… Well, better read it later. It's late already. I must hurry up and go home." _

The walk home was normal, when he got home it was normal too. As well as his mother asking for his grades. He showed them, and they were all the highest score points. He sighed and then left to his room.

He sat and a few minutes later, he was ready to study.

He yawned. Damn, he was tired already.

Before he started, he decided to take something. The coke's effect vanished too fast, so he decided to take some pills from the orange bottle again, which didn't wear off as quickly. After fixing his face up a bit, he lead himself back to his room and study again.

"Done." Three hours later and after skipping dinner because he wasn't hungry, possibly because he had eaten too much at breakfast, but the reason didn't matter. _"I finished the homework. Now I'll study for the college exam… But… Damn that's so boring haha! I want to do something fun… Though I really don't know what to do…" _Raito thought, but then remembered of that black notebook he'd found on the street just a few hours ago and took it from his backpack. "_Let's see... 'How to use it… All the humans whose names are written in this notebook shall die…' Really?" _He thought reading the rules.

After finishing all the rules and seeing if there weren't any more in the note and really scrutinising at the weird notebook, he smirked and turned the TV on. "_Let's test it then!" _he thought._ "It must be somebody I can see die now…" _After turning some channel he found some guy who kidnapped some people and decided that would suit enough.

He wrote his name in the notebook. _"Kurou Otoharada" _Done. Now it was just waiting forty seconds to see if the guy… _'Wait… some people ran away… the-they said the kidnapper just twitched and died!' Yes!! Oh my god! He is really dead!!'_ The news' woman screamed, looking very surprised.

Surprised like Raito. He looked at the black notebook _"I-I… I really killed him? No… no… That's impossible… But… I wrote his name and… I need to write one more name to make sure…"_He turned to another channel then. It was a talk show. A black woman was interviewing some guy… Takuo Shibuimaru… it was some sort of hip-hop singer… Hey! He remembered this guy! He was accused of raping women several times but always got out innocent; the last time it happened was two weeks ago.

"_One more time, let's see what you're capable of, little note…"_ He wrote in the note: _Takuo Shibuimaru death by accident. _

6 minutes and 40 seconds counted.

A big camera suddenly fell from the ceiling right on Takuo's head. He was dead.

The host woman was hysterical. She didn't know what to do. Like everyone else. What just happened? How did it happen? Everyone screamed and ran in fear.

Raito was more than surprised. That notebook really worked! What was he going to do now? In one night he'd killed two people! Two people! He was a murderer now! He… He…

"Hahahahaahahahahahaha!!!" He laughed insanely. "I know exactly what to do." And in seconds, minutes and hours, he had already written several names in the notebook, occupying many pages of it, but he knew it would never end so he didn't worry about. He just kept writing more and more names.

They were all criminals.

"_I can kill people. I have the power to kill! I was gifted with the power to control people's destiny. I'm God now… I'm a true God! I'm a_ Perfect _God now… and my duty, I know, is to bring this perfection to the world, killing the rotten apples that live in it..." _He thought smirking, while he wrote._ "Because perfection is a gift, and we have to earn it." _

_To Be Continued…_

* * *

**Pinku's note: **I know there is a few holes… just ignore them xD I made a few scenes different to be more interesting.

I wanted to show how Raito wants so bad to be perfect, and like he doesn't see he's just a hurt ordinary person like all of us. I really think he's like that in the original manga-anime, but the note books gives him a reason to be different, to be himself or something like that…

And everybody seemed to count on him on something, his sister, his mother, his friends, his father… it's like he had to help everyone and hold weight of the world by himself ya know? That's why I think L and him were so alike, they're equal… maybe was because of that Raito didn't like him… but deep inside he liked him very much… xDD

Ah! Anyway, next chapter L is gonna show himself up \o/ so reviews and I hurry up with it! What this sound for you?? xDD

Reviews byeee xD


	2. Perfect Enemy

**Pinku:**Ok, I'm starting to think this fic should be rated M, but I don't know… I'm horrible would rating… what do you think? n.n'' Sorry the grammar… but this had been beta reader!! Ò.ó/

* * *

Behind the Iron Mask

_Chapter 2 Perfect Enemy _

Raito was thrilled. This Death Note thing was better than he could have ever imagined. Besides, he was known all over the world now, as KIRA. He really didn't like that name, but that didn't matter. He really didn't care about that creepy shinigami following him, he was always silent. He said he was just an observer in this interesting plot.

He didn't understand him. He just stood there, laughing, every time he went to the bathroom or something. He laughed. That weird creepy laugh. But he didn't care about the laugh. The problem is that when he came back from the bathroom –with the shinigami still laughing – he asked why he was laughing, and he answered with those glowing eyes "_nothing, really"_ It was only when Raito insisted that he said, "..._It's that… Humans are so interesting_...

Raito sighed. "That's all you have to say, ever?" Ryuuku laughed more, and the young man sat in his chair, back to his duties.

Turning the TV on, he saw a notice from the police. It said that it was about Kira or something. Raito got turn on in that. It was some guy saying he was L, the famous detective, and that he would catch Kira, that he was evil. Stupid bullshit. Stupid idiotic guy. Kira was _Justice._Kira was_ Perfection._ Kira was _God._ If he didn't see that, he had to die!

Luckily, this L guy had told him his name, _Lind L. Taylor. _No, it was not merely_lucky._ It was _fate._ He was God; he was destined to be, he could feel it.

He smiled. His pupils were dilated. He could feel the energy. "Pity _L_… Maybe if you were a bit smarter we could play a little more…" He didn't think much then, high as he was, he wrote the name of the guy on the screen, on the notebook of the death in big letters. "It was good while lasted… Bye bye, L…"

40 seconds… 3, 2, 1… the man fell. Ha. Easy. Too easy. Raito had won. He laughed, as the winner he was. He liked the feeling. Actually, he liked it very much… "What happens to the ones who oppose me? That was what the world just saw. L… No one can oppose GOD!" He laughed more.

But… what was that? After the man died, a big L appeared on the screen... "Unbelievable… I thought about the possibility, but… Kira, you can actually kill people without laying a finger on them?..." A covered voice spoke to him. Raito was shocked. Ryuuku was laughing. "Kira, pay attention, if you are really the one responsible for the death of Lind L. Taylor on the television, you must know you killed a death sentenced criminal, not me." What the… "He was a criminal whose imprisonment wasn't reported on the media. Looks like you don't have knowledge of criminals like him…" Damn…

"Hahahah. He got you." Damn Ryuuku….

"But I, L, am real! So, try to kill me!" Damn bastard… He… he couldn't do something like that to a God! He couldn't! "Come on! Kill me! Come on! Kill me! Try to kill me!" He _HAD_ to die! "What? Can't do it? So there are really people you can't kill. Thanks for the tip. And let me say something in exchange, it was said this was an international transmission, but, actually, it has only been transmitted in the Kantou area, in Japan."

Raito's eyes glowed in hate and fury. "L. You are going to die. You can be sure of that. _Nobody_ defies God's powers." An evil smile appeared in his face. "And if they do… they face hell…"

Ryuuku laughed. "Humans are so interesting…"

* * *

Raito looked in the mirror at the public bathroom after sniffing some heroine and putting on makeup to cover that horrible face. Hero, or H, as it was called, was too strong going straight to the veins, but he thought that if he sniffed it, it would be lighter, and better. And he was right, the effect was much better than cocaine, without needing much. He just needed to be careful about the addiction, but he never needed more than one shot per day, and never took more than that. Sometimes he didn't take any at all.

He cleaned his nose with a paper towel before getting out and smiled.

When he left, he made sure to do it holding his pants, as if closing his zipper, just to be safe, right before he started his walk to his home in the early evening.

While they walked, Ryuuku started an annoying conversation. "What do you want, Ryuuku?"

"There is some man stalking us. It's been a while… Personally I wouldn't tell you, but it's been bothering me…"

"_What? A man… stalking me? Damn it Ryuuku! Why didn't you tell me before?! He's probably one of L's men!" _Raito thought, already thinking of a plan to kill him.

He probably had already seen too much. He couldn't let him live anymore.

A few feet behind, Raye Pember took some notes… _"Raito Yagami, definitely not Kira. Just a junky." _

He never would guess that boy would be looking at him with an evil smirk on his lips some days later in a subway. "Goodbye, Raye Pember…" And that he would be Kira… "Thank you for everything…"

* * *

L was going in the right direction. At least that was what he felt. After 12 FBI agents had been killed by Kira, he had looked at everyone they had investigated as well as the time they had died. Ray Pember was the second. He was particularly interested in that perfect looking boy. He didn't know why, it was just a feeling. Surely it was just a coincidence that this boy was Soichiro Yagami, his partner and police chief's son, or maybe not…

Before anything, L wanted to see Raye Pember's notes on Raito, they had just got to him and he opened it to read.

"_Raito Yagami, 17 years old, middle-high class student. Definitely not Kira. Just a junky. I found out he took heavy drugs hidden from every one and takes very caution against anyone finding out. It looks like he cares much about his appearance too, maybe he has self-esteem problems, but definitely innocent of the crimes." _

Junky? That was interesting… Self-Esteem problems… Maybe… But L was sure there was more involved than that. He didn't know why, but his face, just his looking at his face, made him feel that. Maybe it was because it was too perfect, and that was the kind of people he thought might be Kira, plus that junky thing… it was so… contradictory, maybe? Didn't matter to him his personals reasons for that, he just wanted to catch Kira.

About the junky thing, he thought it was better not to tell Yagami-san. At least not for now. And after all, if this Raito Yagami was really Kira, the fact he used drugs sometimes would be the less worrisome.

But he couldn't just send the kid to prison or to rehab… he had to have proof, real, material proof, and for that, L had a plan.

* * *

Raito had a plan. After the Raye Pember fiasco he took all his pills out of his room and hid them in a very safe place in the woods. He had some in his backpack that he always kept with himself for protection. He also had to decrease his use of the pills and hero, which made him unable to sleep, too cold, weird sweats and really more tired than normal. He threw away his makeup too. He did not like the idea of being like this ugly weak shell, but L would suspect with that too, so he threw it away.

He felt he needed those more, like he did before, he really wanted to, but he knew he shouldn't. He had to stand all of that until everything was okay, until L was dead. And if that meant no pills, and not even makeup, he would do it. L would die.

But he couldn't stand his ugly, weak appearance for too long, he hated that. And just imagining L stalking him or watching him, anyway, was disgusting. He had to kill L, soon. Anyway, he had a plan.

He entered the house; soon he observed that nobody was there. Raito then, walk to his bedroom, opened the door and went in. That was when he noticed somebody had been in his room, and by the paper at the door, it had not been anyone from his family…

"_L… Finally acted huh?" _

Without a change in his expression, he placed his backpack on his bed and laid on it. Still lying down, he extended his arm to his bag and pulled out a pack of cigarettes and lit one up.

Cigarettes were better than nothing, and they were legal, he didn't like the idea of disappointing his father, who he knew would be watching him, but he couldn't just go without anything at home, sure when he was out he could take some pills or something, but he wouldn't just stand being at the house for five hours studying without support, he knew that. To be the God he was and kill L, he needed that.

He smoked the whole pack.

* * *

"_What does that mean?"_ L thought watching the screen. The seventeen year old teenager had just entered his bedroom, and lit a cigarette while lying on his bed. But Raito wasn't just a smoker from Raye Pember's report. Raye had described him with the word _junky_ and said he used heavy drugs, the FBI detective wouldn't just call him "junky" and "heavy drugs" just because cigarettes. Perhaps he was against any drugs, but still… this was very weird. Hours have passed and Raito just continued like that, lounging, smoking, eyes closed and a cigarette between two fingers. He had to observe more.

"But… What… Raito…" Soichiro spoke at his side. He seemed speechless at the situation.

"I guess you did not know your son was a heavy smoker," L said with a finger in his mouth, looking at the screen, but Soichiro looked at him abruptly.

"What do you mean, Ryuuzaki? My-my son is-is not a heavy smoker! He-he is just… I'm sure he's stopping… He would never do…"tThe police chief said, but stopped himself and looked down, immediately going back to the monitor. "Raito… Why?"

L just listened. The father seemed to count a lot on his son, it seemed he would never guess something like that too; he seemed already broken just by the fact of knowing his son smoked. L reflected, how would he react if he knew his son was a junky? That he took heavy, probably illegal drugs?

L sighed. "If you really think that, we will see through this week… We can even see if he is Kira or… takes other types of drugs…" L said in his usual tone of voice without really looking at Yagami's father, but still watching him closely.

"Ryuuzaki… You don't think my son is a junky do you? He is a diligent boy, always studying, gets good grades, has an excellent appearance, there's no way he…" This time it was Ryuuzaki who interrupted him.

"We will see, Yagami-san… We will see…"

Soichiro just stayed silent, and went back to his son. He had nothing to say.

After a week watching Raito Yagami, L had no other alternative besides taking the cameras out. The boy wasn't Kira, and what was totally contradicting, he wasn't a drug addicted either, just a smoker. He could, which he found incredible, smoke two packs of cigarettes in a matter of four hours of daily study. But he still wasn't totally sure he was innocent like Raye Pember or even his father, Soichiro, claimed.

He watched him. He watched Raito closely. He had dark bags under his eyes, he seemed really tired, and he didn't eat much in all his meals, he never finished his plate and one time all week he repeated and ate chips after. At times, he moved, scrambled and stirred himself in the bed, and then he stopped, probably pretended to sleep. But he didn't deceive L. He could see he was pretending, which begged the question, why did he have to pretend he was asleep? If he couldn't, he could just get up and get some milk or something to help, like normal people, if he had insomnia, he could just turn the TV on and watch it. But pretending all week, this was all too weird to be just a coincidence, and even raised his suspicion of him being Kira.

"_Raito Yagami… What is your secret?" _L thought thinking of a plan already. He smiled. _"I will discovered it, _Raito-kun, _be sure of it…" _

* * *

It was the day of the national exam. Raito was calm. Much more after Ryuuku told him the cameras were gone from his room, so he could take his pills again.

He had a special 7 pills from the orange bottle for that. But anyway it was being very easy.

He was focussed on that, when he heard some exam invigilator screaming, "Candidate 68 please sit correctly!! Candidate 68!!"

He could only imagine how that guy was sitting, why couldn't people act normally? It was so easy! Sitting as normal people then… it was even easier! They didn't need to be perfect, like him, but… normal was okay, anyway he hated freaks, they were just people who thought they were more in a world they thought could be more. But they weren't, and it can't. Only a god could make a world different, a God like him.

But he felt, he could feel -he didn't know why, he couldn't see, but he could feel- the freak's eyes on him, seeing him, watching him.

* * *

College acceptance ceremony day, Raito had a speech with some unknown guy called Ryuuga Hideki, yeah… like that superstar from TV, Raito was sure it wasn't him, but he and Raito had to speech together, because both had gotten the highest – maximum - grades on the exam.

The speech proceeded and it turned out that Ryuuga Hideki was a freak, just like the ones he hated, but this one was just some lazy guy, unsocial, probably spent hours on the internet watching porn. That was disgusting to Raito, but he stood in his pretty perfect suit that he had just bought. It had a cigarette smell because he'd had a smoke at home, and took some pills to smile beautifully with his makeup he had got back too.

The speech was perfect, he smiled victoriously as he walked down the stairs to his chair. The freak walked just behind him, with his jeans and dirty shirt and sock-less and half-worn sneakers. Raito wanted to throw up; couldn't he dress up nicely with a_ suit_ or something at least once in his life??

He was almost getting in his chair, the bad feeling in his stomach was going away, when he felt the freak approaching him.

"I am L," he said in his ear.

What? Raito got immediately surprised, but soon he got back into his wheels, and smiled to "L".

Now everything made sense.

_To Be Continued…_

* * *

**Pinku:**Yeah! I will probably rate this fic M soon after posting it, soon don't scare yourself if you read and is already M and you think I'm crazy okay? XDD

I really liked this chapter 8DD Raito thinks L's a freak hahahahah poor L…. poor Raito too he doesn't know his destiny… XD

Anyway…. Liked? Not? review! Please! Polite ones please!!

8DD


	3. Feeble Divinity

Behind the Iron Mask

_Chapter__ 3 Feeble Divinity _

"I am L" He said next to his ear. Raito took a deep breathe. Now everything made sense, that freak had to be L. Only someone like him would be crazy enough to defy God!

But he had to act normal now. He had to act like a God would.

"Nice to meet you, L, I can say thank you for trying to catch Kira, and I can't say in words how much I appreciate your work and what you do for us." Raito squeezed L's hands "But I can't imagine why a word known detective would worry with presenting himself for an ordinary college boy, like me…" Surelly that was a lie.

Yes L had to admit to himself. Raito was a tremendous good actor.

"Well, I'm sure you aren't just an ordinary college boy, Yagami-kun…" L said.

"_Damn freak…"_ Raito thought, wishing his thoughts of him dying were enough to kill while they sat in they're chairs.

Unhappily, to Raito, nothing of this happened. He kept quiet till the end of the ceremony. And L, kept observing him, noticing he seemed to try to hide his emoticons, still greeting Raito mentally for his actor's skills. _"If you are Kira, you are probably wishing me to die, right, Raito-kun?"_

At the end, Ryuuku was laughing, Raito was trying was possible to hide his anger. The L, seemed to be observing him.

"kukuku It was a very interesting ceremony, wasn't it Raito?" The shinigami Laughed.

"Yagami-kun"

"Hey that guy is calling you" The shinigami spoke while Raito turned his head around.

"It was a very pleased to meet you, Yagami-kun" That L said, raising his hand.

"Pleased to meet you too" Raito gave him a fake smile and grab his hand just like that freako. "I hope we meet again…L…"

They shove hands smiling. Each one knowing the other had others interests and both knowing each other's falsity.

And each other knowing each other wanted something else from each other.

"Please call me Ryuuga between other people. And I hope to meet you again, Yagami-kun."

And each other wanting to use each other.

"Good bye Yagami-kun."

"Sure. Good bye Ryuuga"

The L guy closed the door and next that, the car moved. Raito kept looking at it until the car disappeared from his view.

Raito was apparently controlled. Ryuuku was amazed; he thought Raito would run directly for a bathroom or some hidden place to a sniff or some drug, since for the shinigami the boy was quite a drug user! Not to say addicted, nor junky, nor that he cared either, it was fun for him, so it was okay.

When they got home, Raito was still looking like his character, per say, for the God of Death, it was a character, because he played a person outside, but inside he was so different than he seemed. He didn't think the boy knew that, or did that with this intention of acting though. But either way, when Raito got in his bedroom, he went and sat in his study chair. Ryuuku just got watching. What a tension!

Oh that was it! Raito just started exhaling. "Damn it. Damn it. Damn it!!" he opened his drawer with a sudden movement and got something from there. Underneath the hidden passage he made by the death note, he opened that, and found the death note, a normal note book, and a small bag. "That bastard! That, that freaking bastard!!"

He opened the small bag, it had a small old like paper with something written in there with little dust inside too, it really wasn't much; it just was enough of one shout. Raito kept there for emergencies and everyone who thought would thought it was just normal dust, sure if they got there without exploding the whole room.

"_No. I have to stay calm…" _Raito thought to himself. Then he threw the little dust over the study table, and with the small paper help, he sniffed it all to his nose. _"Calm. Raito. Calm. I can't be this nervous. It's not my genius to be nervous. It's not…" _ He could feel already the effect of the drug in his system. Fast. This one had been fast, he surprised himself.

He laid his head, his face looking at Ryuuku, and it all supported but his arms.

"Kukuku" The Shinigami finally understood. It was just a play. He wouldn't be catch like this in front of other people. It was _his_ secret. Only his. "Feeling better now?" he asked, still finding it all interesting, and with a smile on his lips, but a different one from that whose was always there.

"Yes… Now I can think better…" Raito said, sitting his chair in a normal way, but his head still a bit fallen like, since he wasn't that lucid, with the heroine he always felt and see things such a crazy things… he felt so alive, so much better, when he used the Death Note with was equal.

"Uh-huh… and what are you going to with that L guy? Will you make the eye trade?"

Raito laughed. Ryuuku didn't see what was so funny, but thought it was probably another result of that thing he had smelled, when he did more than he used he lost his "action control" and started to be "happily" like. It was funny. Ryuuku found it quite interesting.

"What?" Ryuuku finally asked.

"Are you crazy?!" Raito shouted at him, suddenly being angry. "If I do that and kill him everybody will see that, I am Kira!!"

"Oh Yeah.. uupps…" Ryuuku realized "So what are you going to do?"

"First, I have to see exactly what this Ryuuga freak want…" Raito smiked. His face was dark and evil like.

For Ryuuku, it meant it had more fun to come.

Kukuku…

* * *

Some days passed. L called Raito to a tennis match at the campus and a good competitor, Raito accepted.

At the day, Raito prepared himself very perfectly. He put his best sport clothing, combed his hair, water proof make-up to cover his pale and ugly face, and had swallowed some pills before just to give him energy to the match. He had been study hard, plus this work as Kira has really made his more tired.

However, it still didn't seem enough. It had fast gone away its effect. He knew he should have sniffed heroine, but he didn't want to do that always, or he might get addicted to that.

When he looked at L, he got disgusted, how come someone could use the same clothes again and again? And to a Tennis match!! How come somebody could play with that ugly outfit!! He probably didn't even wash!! Ewc. It was good Raito was excellent at acting, he pretending everything was fine and they started to play, during it, Raito noticed he was very good, what was good because Raito hated to win from somebody weak, it was boring.

He breathed fast. He was tired. But he couldn't lose, he hated to lose! He was behind now, and it was the final match, it was now or nothing!!

He could see L, or Ryuuga's eyes on him. watching him. Noticing every move he made, every breath he take. He was there, with those freaking eyes of his.

_Freak_.

L noticed that. Raito got tired very easily. Sure that wasn't very important for the Kira case, but the detective thought it was still of use of him.

He had been watching Raito since First day of this college. That was the main reason he got in anyway, to observe him. He notice the boy acted nice to everybody, he was always neat, always his hair always combed and his face always smiled when somebody went to ask something to him, he seemed to be nice to everybody. L suspected that he had this sort of addiction, this habit to look and act always perfect around people. He didn't really understand why, but it could be something to Kira. If everything had to be perfect for him, than the world would have to be the same, right?

He was always nice to people, he was always talking to somebody, he didn't have any friends in particular, beside L, but L knew the young man didn't consider him as a friend, he probably didn't like him at all, he probably acted nice to him just because of this need to be perfect too.

The drug probably fitted somewhere there too.

He looked at Raito. He seemed tired. Probably needing the drug already, but he still fought to win. That was a Kira quality for sure. Too bad he lost, but was no surprise since how his conditions were.

After the match, Raito washed himself and changed his outfit. L did something too, but just because the boy insisted. When they returned to be together, Ryuuzaki noticed Raito seemed much better, much brighter. He didn't let the dilated pupils, which he also noticed Raito tried to hide them, go without noticing them.

The two geniuses went to a place to drink some café, L recommended and the chestnut accepted.

"You were right Ryuuzaki, this place is really nice" The chocolate eyed complemented, like always, this need to be nice to people, L didn't understood. With this it gave more credit to his theory, and L felt it had to do to the drug addiction too. He was tired; maybe he wasn't tired just because he needed the drug. Maybe he needed the drug because he was tired. Confuse? Very… L always got confuse when it had to do with Raito Yagami. Maybe that was why he thought this young man was so fascinating.

"Yes" L agreed. "Listen Raito… Tell me, why do you have this need to look perfect? Why do you need to be accepted and loved? Why do you fight so much for perfection?" He decided to ask, to see the answer.

But for several time, all he saw was a surprised look at his face.

Until everything fell.

_Oh No…_ What had he done?

_To Be Continued…_

* * *

**Pinku: **Hello pretty people! 8D (you: waaa I'm pretty!! I'm really pretty!! T.T) o.o' oh well… er… yeah… anyway… Sorry if I took so long… I just had not been inspired for this fiction n.n''' but I will try not to take so long this time.. promise…

I liked this chapter, it was very well written and stuff… don't you? '-'

Well I have everything planned for a while now… yesterday I saw this news about couple of girls who were drug addicted and I got full of ideas xDD

Good for you huh? Huh??

Well if you liked it, send me a review! Make me feel pretty!! 8D


	4. Friend or Fool

Behind the Iron Mask

_Chapter__ 4 Friend or Fool _

"You were right Ryuuzaki, this place is really nice" Raito said.

"Yes" L agreed. "Listen Raito… Tell me, why do you have this need to look perfect? Why do you need to be accepted and loved? Why do you fight so much for perfection?" He watched as the young man continued to look surprise, but still he didn't stop speaking "You don't seem to have any friends and nobody seems to care much about you either…" L didn't notice the chestnut started to look angry and upset from his words, what he did notice were the tears, which started to fall from his annoyed eyes.

"Wh-what…" his head was looking a bit down, that's why L couldn't see his eyes, whose were hidden in his hair, on that position his current was, but the onyx eye's mouth were already closed, listening to the chocolate haired one to talk "What do you know about people? About friends? About perfection? Your freak?! You're just a weird little man, who probably lives alone in an apartment 24/7 per day connected to a computer and checking out naked women, or men, 'cause you're so freaking weird it wouldn't be strange if you were a fag, or a bi, what do you know about everything anyway? What do you know about me?" He paused a moment and sobbed several times "What do you know how I feel to judge me like that?"

Raito ended up the sentence sobbing hardily, he tried to stop the tears from coming out, but it was practically impossible. L observed this; he thought a moment before saying anything "I don't know. That's exactly why I asked" He didn't know if these were the right words, however, he didn't know what to do. He never thought the boy could just break like that.

"Exactly! You don't know..." The detective decided just to listen now "…how hard is for someone to look good, to be accepted by people, and be accepted in society… A person like you wouldn't understand…"

The black haired man was starting to understand… but he still didn't know, was this an act? He was just playing with L for the fun of playing, maybe hiding something? But still with those tears… they looked real… and L knew but Raye Pember's report that Raito had used drugs. An FBI agent wouldn't lie, he wouldn't make things up and if he wasn't sure, he would investigate to make sure, and if it was already written, he was sure.

Or it was true?

Emotions were flowing at him so sensibly, so fragile, because he was emotionally broken, because his self-esteem was low, and he needed to feel better about himself, with drugs, with perfection, with friends, even if they're fake, with Kira… He needed to be accepted, to feel loved, superior, God, only to feel better about his own self, to fill this hole he had inside of him.

L thought, which one seemed to be the truth? Which one seemed more believable?

He would need to play the game to see. But in some way to not hurt him if the case were that he was saying the truth. For some reason, he didn't want to hurt him more, probably because he seemed already so hurt already… so delicate…

"I guess so… I don't understand people's mind. Why they fight so much to be accepted, why can't they just accept the others like they were?" L spoke, he wanted to see his reaction, and he probably wouldn't be hurt with this pronunciation from L's observation.

"Because many people are ugly, and ugly people don't have space in today's society" What was that? Did Raito think he was ugly? "So as do stupid people. Today just smart, geniuses and beautiful people have space, if you're not these two you're lost. Wanting or not, that's how it is" L looked that Raito's eyes were looking down again, but this time it seemed different, it seemed to be in a sadder look, apathetic, empty. Perhaps the drug effect was going, he looked calmer, probably not all was gone yet, just a bit part.

"Raito-kun… You are not ugly. You are very intelligent and I think you're really beautiful too, thought I would probably like you more if you haven't wearing all this make-up and without this cigarette smell…"

"I don't like it either…" Raito said automatically, he had not realized what L had said until he ended his phrase. Had he called him… beautiful? He had complemented him… He had called him intelligent too… why? He wasn't that! He wasn't beautiful! He was ugly and… and stupid! He was… He shouldn't… L was probably lying… Yes! He hated him and wanted to get rid of him fast! That's why he's telling things he thought Raito probably wanted to hear! That made sense… with how this conversation started, that question, he was L, he was trying to capture Kira after all… and he was this damn weird freak…

But still… lie or not a lie… he had never been called beautiful and intelligent before… All his life he had been just a brain. His friends at school, they asked him to help with lessons, but at end, they just said a 'thanks' and got out. The girls, he knew some liked him, but it was said always in whispers between themselves. They never really had declared to him. And his parents, since he was a small kid just he heard from them was that he had to study, to get a good college, good grades, good life… he had forgotten how was good to be complemented instead of always complement himself. It felt good… even if was just a lie…

"So, stop with it" L suggested, speaking with careful words. He didn't know how Raito had react with the words he just had said… he had called him beautiful… he had never said such words for anyone before… but for him they had just flew out of his mouth… they were all true… everything…

"I… need to go now…" Raito got up, L watched as he trembled, he seemed unsecured, the detective was practically sure the drug effect was gone now. It had been gone quite fast… that couldn't be good. It meant he was using quite a while and he needed more to get the same effect, and if how much he use, faster he will get more addicted. L knew it need at least a time of 3 months of using it everyday, many times a day, to get addicted. If he was right and Raito was doing that, he was probably already an addicted and didn't realize it.

"Already? I thought about talking with you about…"

"I-I can't…" Raito stammered "I really have to go. Bye" He finished to get his things and walked away.

"See you" L said when he was already half way out. He needed a new plane.

He paid the bill and walked away.

L had nothing else to do there.

* * *

Raito walked away fast, he didn't want to stay there, he didn't want to be with L right now… He wanted… he wanted to be alone… with his thoughts… Not with… with that liar… He was lying he wasn't pretty! He wasn't beautiful or handsome or smart or intelligent or any of those things! He fought so much to be these things; he didn't someone saying his battle was useless!!

He breathing was fast, he was running and he was nervous. He needed to calm down… he needed… a public restroom…

He turned his head as he stopped walking. There was a public restroom just next to him.

Raito had a syringe in his things… he had bought once ans used just one time... maybe two... he still was sniffing it all... he had some hero too… maybe…

Yeah… that would be good… that would be great! He… he need to feel good… to feel beautiful and intelligent and all those things L spoke he was… maybe… maybe with a bigger syringe shot he could feel it…

Maybe…

If he didn't… then it would be a lie…

He had to try…

He got in, and grabbed his stuff.

He had to try.

* * *

L didn't know what to… perhaps he had talked too much… perhaps he shouldn't have said those things…

But that reaction did raised his suspicions about Kira over the young man.

But why didn't he feel good about that?

Probably because there was this drug question on it… drugs were always a problem… and how would he tell his parents? His father? L worked with him… he was good with secrets, but drugs were a subject too much important to him to keep a secret for too long…

He sighed. His thoughts were a mess, he needed a sweet…

He walked over the city, probably the same way Raito did. He probably would be able to see him in where he was too.

The onyx eyed looked ahead.

Nothing of the boy.

L stopped. _Why?_ _How? _He looked around. A public restroom... A public place were all kind of people used for all kind of things, not just the two main things they were supposed to be for…

_Oh no_… He started to walk towards that place. _All kind of things. _ That couldn't be good. Raito was sensible, he was in a fragile state, he shouldn't have let him alone, he could be… if he was right and he was really a drug addicted, a junky then he… he…

He got in there, apparently empty.

L started to open the private toilet's doors, first, second, third… apparently all empty…

He went to the last one…

It had a person there, sitting at the floor, head supported by the wall, eyes staring blankly at the ceiling.

"Raito-kun… oh no…" L got scared, he saw a syringe at the floor. Immediately, he kneeled closed to him.

"Hey Ryuuzaki… You were right… I am beautiful…" He heard a whispering in his ear, right before his eyes closing.

He got his mobile and called a number.

"Hello, I need an ambulance. It's an overdose case…"

_To Be Continued… _

* * *

**Pinku: **I realized the first part and second have really different types of writing, when I saw I wrote "self one" instead of "cell phone" it was a sign a needed to stop… I want to sleep xD and don't bother me it's too short, 'cause I updated really early!!

I wanted that 'cause I really took long last time… besides I was inspired.. heheh

Heey did you liked?? I loved that conversation… and I finally to the overdose part!! 8D

Welll I want to sleep…

Review me please?

Bye bye xD


	5. Help in Need

Behind the Iron Mask

_Chapter__ 5 Help in Need _

L got scared. He had never seen such thing before, not if hadn't a screen between him and the person. And with Raito… for some reason he had feeling really bad too… Why did he care so much about this boy? He was a drug user, probably a mass murderer too…

He reminded himself of the vision, Raito, curled on the toilet floor, body all flabby and with an arm bruised from the syringe shot. Head supported by the all, turned up to the ceiling, but staring at nothing, but like he could see something nobody else could; A smile on his lips, as he whispered those words. He seemed so vulnerable, so weak, so innocent, so pure... Okay, now L was exaggerating… He was, he must be Kira, a serial killer, no way in hell he would be pure and innocent… right?

L shook his head. He had to kill these thoughts off. Why he was thinking such things anyway? He had more important stuff to full his mind. Raito was unconscious in front of him, just had get out after hours of surgery, still in recovery and in ER.

It had been hard. It was luck they had got fast. L usually didn't like doctors and hospitals, but for Raito didn't die it was the faster and most security way. If the boy died just after their meeting, what Yagami-san would say? What would L say to him? He was not prepared for such a thing like that…

But still... he still had to tell the father why his son was in a hospital, unconscious and had nearly died after their meeting.

He sighed. And he called that luck?

He looked at Raito, laid at the bed with many strings attaches to his arms, filling him with blood to clean his one whose was too dirtied with drugs; there was serum too, because he was a bit anemic. In his chest, some heart marker, pressing and other things. And in his face, a breathing mask, to help him to breathe better, as the name said itself.

The machine said his pressure and heart beats. L observed the boy was better than before, his condition was improving, and that was a good thing, at least. The bad thing was that he didn't wake up. However, L hoped Raito would open his eyes sooner than it hoped.

While that, he got his laptop and typed, doing his job even in a boring place like a hospital. He had been doing it since he had brought the overdosed boy to the hospital a few hours ago.

"Ne, Raito-kun, when are you going to wake up?" he asked to the sleeping boy, not really waiting for him to answer.

And he didn't get. Raito stayed there, sleeping, eyes closed.

Until he heard L's voice and started to turn in bed.

"Raito-kun? Are you okay? Raito-kun?" L tried again, too see if he got anymore answer from the young man. "Raito-kun, wake up!" Said and done. As soon as L spoke again, Raito slowly and numbly, opened his eyes. "Raito-kun?"

"Huh?" Raito looked around, trying to find himself and what had happened. He remembered a few pieces. Being in a public restroom and shoot himself with heroine, not for the first time, and then all black… "Ryuuzaki?" He looked at the freak man and the strings in his arms. He was in a hospital. Had he taken too much and suffered an overdose?

He probably had. But anyway… it felt good… he felt… good… for the first time in a long time.

It had not been any hallucinations this time, probably because he had taken too much and went to an overdose. He was almost totally right that he went unconscious. And out of his mind, he did not dream, did not think, did not feel. Just was… it was wonderful… A wonderful place of nothing…

But then, he heard something… and this something was making him come back… and then… he came back to consciousness… and discovered that it was L…

"Yes. You took an overdose and came here." Ah. He was right after all… "Do you know where you are?"

"A Hospital?"

"Yes. You are right." L nodded. "You know your name?" This was probably a tactic to see if Raito's brain was working properly.

"Raito Yagami" His mind could be as numb as anything, but he still knew his name. "I am 18 years old too"

"Good, your brain seems fine." L was calmer. That tranquilized him. To know Raito's brain was working fine in just a few hours after the overdose was good, it seemed a little slow, but it was normal. After all he took… he didn't know what he cared so much, the boy was probably a serial killer. But it was good he was alive. "We can talk now. I want to have a conversation with you know. Before I call your father"

"My… father?" Oh no… Raito's dad… If the man discovered about Raito's little party… what would he say about Raito? He would never be able to look in his son's face again! He would se so disappointed! He would be devastated! No… Raito would not be able to take it… he… had to do something!

"Yes. Your father. I still had not told him anything. I only told we were still talking. And that's the story until now." L looked at Raito, whom, since he mentioned his father, started to look worriedly and tremble. Probably scared. This young man seemed a person very dependant of other's people opinion over him, he probable was very scared just by thinking his father would be disappointed at him.

"Oh… Okay…" That was relieving. At least L did not do anything stupid. "Don't tell him I overdosed…" It was humiliating, but he didn't want L to do anything stupid!

For L, this sounded more like a please than like a request, sure, the chestnut really must be humiliated. He didn't look like a person who liked to plead. But if he did, then this is probably something really important to him. And probably really was. His image with his family would be crashed if his dad knew about his drug problem. And his self-esteem would be even lower.

"Then, I will tell him you had fainted because you were overtired after the exercise, because you had been studying and over pushing yourself. This probably must be enough for him to believe"

Raito got dumbfounded. This excuse looked complete already, L had probably thought of it during several times! This meant that he was going to say an excuse, and not the stupid true, all the time along…

Raito didn't need to humiliate himself. Damn L! Damn this freak!!

"No problem, Raito-kun" L assured him, but that was not the conversation he wanted to have with the boy.

He stared at the young male, he looked so pale, so vulnerable, the detective imagined what must be going through his head for him to do such thing. L could understand why he used drugs, but, after their previous conversation, he thought the young man would be feeling better, not worse… His mind was probably in pieces. He must think that the raven haired was lying… but L was telling the truth. All those weeks looking and watching him through the hidden cameras, he noted all of those things about the boy, all those things he didn't noted about himself, all those things he needed to know…

After a long and awkward silence, the pale older male decided to speak. Raito was now looking at the ceiling, probably wondering about his life or something relative, his eyes showed how tired he was, the chestnut probably wanted to sleep, but not with L at the same room as him.

"Raito-kun… I was not lying about what I said earlier" L suddenly said. He noted the young killer turning to stare at him. "I do think you are a very smart and handsome boy." He paused a moment to look at the other's male expression "But I do _know_ you're Kira and I have proofs enough to send you to jail" Raye Pember, the Camera where enough to send him to jail for drugs and traffic and L knew this. He needed more things to send him for Kira, but it was just time until he got those.

Raito was speechless. What would he do? He didn't want to die; he didn't want to go to jail. Even less from this… freak! And why did he have to say he was telling the truth? For Raito to believe? How would he believe in such thing? He only did and he was high on hero…

But if he did at sometime, it meant he was, right? He just had to feel it…

Why couldn't he feel it, any other time?

He wanted… he wanted to badly… to feel good, to feel beautiful, to feel perfect, without any substance working in his system…

Did this _freak_ felt this way about himself? That was why he didn't care about anything like that?

…The chocolate eyed wanted to feel good about himself… Maybe… Maybe… Maybe L was telling the truth? Maybe then… the Freak could help Raito?

"…I don't want to go to jail…" L could barely hear, because the younger just whispered very low. "Can you help me?..."

L smiled. He could, and he wanted.

"Yes." He just said "I can."

The younger smiled weakly too. It was humiliating, but what choice did he have?

"First you have to tell me what exactly is your way to kill, as Kira, depending of how, if I can be sure of a way you can never kill again, I may let you go. Then, you have to admit your drug problems. It's the first step to be clean. The first few days are a bit hard because your detoxifying, but I will be with you, until the end. And if you complete until the final step and be completely free from the drugs and if I be one-hundred- percent sure I can trust you, then we can talk about a possible vague of you working with me, with your father" L could see Raito's eye shining when he said the last few words. The younger might not like him, but he knew he was a World's Greatest Detective, and working with him, or for him, must be wonderful, even if he hated him "I can assure to you I will be very strict on my judgment of you and if I refuse to believe one-hundred in any of these things, you will go to jail."

Raito knew he wanted the work. It would be very good to be with somebody as smart as him for once, unless those boring classes… and If… if this freak really was telling the truth… Perhaps it would work the painful detox… But it would probably be better to wait and see if he really wanted, how L would be… How L was… What was better for himself… either way, was a new beginning… he could only hope it would be for the better…

"Okay… But about the job, I will wait and see… how it… how us work…"

"Good. I will be here tomorrow with a tape to record your confessing." L was happy the young male had accepted, he couldn't figure exactly why, but he knew that, in the future, everything would adjust, and would be better. "But, don't worry. I know everything will be fine, the record is just if you fail. But you will not fail, right?"

"No" Raito shook his head, complete security in his eyes, a sercurity he didn't remember last time he felt without drugs or the death note. It was strange, this person seemed to trust him, he didn't seemed to think he was complete failure, and in a certain way, he was happy, this made him happy, happy in a way he had never been in a long time. Not only because of this strange feelings L gave him in these words he said, neither because this way a new beginning. But also, because he knew, he would not be alone the way he was anymore, and maybe, this person was different. L was different from everyone else he ever met.

Perhaps it would work.

_The End!_

* * *

**Pinku: **And after a long wait… Which, I had promised myself I would not do it again. I decided to finish it in this chapter. I had no more ideas because I forgot xD and I knew I would not update this soon. (besides the fact that this was a good chapter to end) So, I finished.

I hope you had enjoyed, because I really did. n.n It was a good day for me, because I was inspired to write and I wanted to write so I think at the end it was something…. kind of good xD

I really sorry for my grammar, but I don't think this will be beta read anytime soon… xD

So, if you liked, review, tell me what you think n.n/

And go read my other stories \o\

xD

bye bye \o\


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